Batman Monthly Vol.1 #1

[Jun 1988]. Cover price 75p.
48 pages. Full colour.
London Editions Magazines

Cover by José Luis García-López.

Free cover-mounted badge.

Contents:

.2 The Untold Legend of the Batman, part one, In the Beginning w: Len Wein; p: John Byrne, i: Jim Aparo, lettering by John Costanza, colouring by Glynis Wein.

r: The Untold Legend of the Batman (DC Comics) #01 (Jul 1980).

11 Peter Pez Battles With the Photons advertisement for Pez; a: UNKNOWN.

24 Bat Talk Adam West interview by Brian Clarke.

26 The Untold Legend of the Batman, part two, "With Friends Like These..." w: Len Wein; a: Jim Aparo, lettering by Jim Aparo, colouring by Glynis Wein.

r: The Untold Legend of the Batman (DC Comics) #02 (Aug 1980).

36 Invade Forbidden Planet advertisement.

48 Transformers Pretenders advertisement.

There's an appropriately nostalgic feeling to the first issue - the cover utilizes the image of Batman and Robin often seen on T-shirts, the free badge is bright and cheerful, and Adam West is interviewed about his time in the role. Even the selection of strips, reprinting the first two issues of The Untold Legend of the Batman, harkens back to a time when Bat-prefixes abounded.

Deep within the bowels of the city, a solitary dark-clad figure sits nestled in the shadows of a vast sprawling cavern...

Here, the most modern scientific equipment looms beside the most ancient tools of the murderer's art, and countless unique trophies stand in mute testimony to the ability of one man...

It is a cavern filled to bursting with the stuff of legend...

Straight from the start, Len Wein makes sure that we are in familiar territory: the giant playing card, the dinosaur, the penny... and, for reasons not explained, the grandfather clock. Alfred arrives with a sandwich for Bruce, who is sitting the Batcave wearing his costume and reading his fan-mail. Some might call this weird, but its really Batman being prepared for anything. You never know when a scurrilous villain will post himself to the Batcave.

A package is the last item to be opened, and Bruce discovers a shredded Bat-costume within - one which his father wore. Someone broke into the Batcave and stole it from under Batman's nose, leaving a note taped to the display case from the inside: "This is only the beginning, Batman! Before I'm done, I will destroy you!" The testicular fortitude of the man who did that is immense.

Bruce starts reminiscing about watching Bat-Daddy as a boy. Apparently, Thomas Wayne was kidnapped from a charity ball to tend to the gunshot wound of a bank robber, but managed to escape and fetch police to arrest them. It is implied that Lew Moxon arranged for Joe Chill to shoot Bruce's parents, setting him on the path to Bat-Diary filled days of socking villains on the jaw and climbing up walls with Robin.

Bruce's Uncle Philip was then appointed his guardian, and introduced him to Mrs. Chilton, his housekeeper. Alfred (in thought bubbles) notes that Mrs. Chilton was also mother to Joe Chill, a secret he has been keeping from Bruce. Master detective that Batman is, the family photos never clued him in on the connection. A year after the murder of his parents, Bruce read a newspaper about Harvey Harris, a detective who caught a criminal dubbed the Skyway Robber. That night, Bruce dressed up in disguise (a proto-Robin outfit) to talk to Harris, and ends up saving the policeman's life. As thanks, Harris agrees to teach Bruce.

Bruce continues, telling Alfred about how he taught himself all he could in order to fight crime. Alfred, having heard this all before simply goes along with the rambling history lesson. It is likely all those bangs on the head - Bruce's skull must look like a jigsaw puzzle after all those years of fighting. He goes on (and on) about how he tracked down Joe Chill, and was there when the man died.

Figuring out that Moxon was behind Chill shooting his parents, he tells Alfred how he went after Moxon, with Robin alongside for the adventure. Putting on the Bat-Daddy costume, Bruce confronts an amnesiac Moxon, who promptly freaks out and runs in front of the nearest car. Having done boring Alfred senseless, Bruce rushes to the Batmobile, leaving his sandwiches behind.

A thrilling tale with which to begin the title, with Bruce reminiscing with Alfred, then driving off like a madman. I'm not sure if this is meant to be the begin of Bruce's slide into Alzheimer's, or a subtle hint that Alfred has been dosing Bruce's cocoa and gaslighting him. It is a very strange story, with no discernible point to make about the characters.

The Adam West interview isn't an in-depth analysis, but it has a few great insights into the Tim Burton remake, as well as his life after the series ended. It would have been nice to get a three or four-page interview (interspersed with images, there's barely enough text to fill a page), but - even as fragmented as the feature is - it is still far better than the strips.

Speaking of which...

For years, it has been whispered - in the dark dens of the wicked - in the bright halls of the just! Now, at last, it can be told...

The Untold Legend of the Batman

Batman marches into a bar filled with criminals, and talks to a guy he calls snitch. It's Bruce's memory - really not what it used to be. Someone starts trouble, and Bruce is ready to beat everyone within striking distance into comas before Robin steps in and gently scolds him for his behaviour. As Bruce drives Robin away from the bar, the Kid Wonder starts to think about his history. Arriving back at the Batcave, Alfred offers them something to drink in a completely non-suspicious manner.

I wonder if either Batman or Robin ever climb up the dinosaur, sit on it and say "Go horsey, go!"

Alfred succumbs to the trend for pointless, endless dreams of the past, remembering WWII, his time as a raging thespian, and his father's death. Probably from the discovery his son had taken to the stage. Scratch Batman's Alzheimer's diagnosis - now that Alfred has begun day-dreaming about the good old days, the problem must be more serious. Possibly a brain-eating fungus, or Batmite screwing with their perception of reality, or the result of a half-baked script.

Batman finally points out his suspects - including The Black Spider, Mr. Freeze, Catwoman, Tweedledee & Tweedledum, Penguin, Prof. Milo, Killer Moth, Poison Ivy, The Joker, Gentleman Ghost, Scarecrow, The Riddler, Two-Face, and Ra's al Ghul. Creepily, he has Polaroids of his enemies (some obviously posed), which raises far too many questions about Bruce. Instead of attempting to solve the theft and destruction of Bat-Daddy's costume, the trio then stand around chatting.

Robin, fed up of the constant inaction in the script, jumps into the Batmobile, which promptly explodes. Another message is discovered in the wreckage: "One by one, I will destroy the things that make you what you are - and then I will destroy you!"

There must be a dozen or so solid, tight, suspenseful little tales that would have better suited the first issue requirements. The main problem with the story is the complete lack of tension in dealing with the theft and destruction of a prized item. Bruce doesn't dust for prints, check security camera footage, or even ask his supercomputer for answers - he rushes out to beat up a guy whose name he can't remember, then pulls out his photos. The Untold Legend of the Batman contains so little narrative progression that it may constitute a non-story.

At least the series can't get any worse.