Eagle [Vol.21] #2

03 Apr 1982. Cover price 20p.
32 pages. Colour & B&W contents.
IPC Magazines Ltd.

Edited by David Hunt.

Photo cover by Gary Compton.

Free Golden Eagle badge.

Contents:

 2 Eagle Hotline The Eagle Has Really Landed! text introduction by David Hunt. / Your Free Gift / Get Ready For... Roar film preview / Eagle Book of Records reader feedback requested. / New This Week introduction to The Money Page and The Adventures of Fred. / Odd Spot photograph (uncredited). / Happy Birthday / Last Minute Department reader feedback requested.

 3 Doomlord UNTITLED [No Trace of the Spaceship], part two, w: Alan Grant; photography by Gary Compton.

 7 Wellie of the Week Terry Wogan photograph (uncredited). / Eagle Sweet Talk Scarey Sticks / Things that Go Chomp in the Night! / Rocky Horror! / Caught by the Camera Boeing 727 photograph by Hans Wendt. / Ernie UNTITLED [Being a Star Comes Naturally] w:/a: Dave Follows.

 8 Squadron Leaders advertisement for Humbrol 1/48 and 1/72 scale models.

 9 Eagle Data File Sea King Har 3 fact file; illustration (uncredited).

10 The Adventures of Fred UNTITLED [Read the Signs] w: UNKNOWN (uncredited); photographs (uncredited).

11 The Collector Assassin w: Brian Burrell; a: Pat Wright, photography by Sven Arnstein.

14 The Unexplained! Demon Guard (one third page) text feature by UNKNOWN (uncredited); a: UNKNOWN (uncredited). / The Symbol of Excellence (one sixth page) newsagent order form.

26 Daley's Diary It's Best by Boat! / Forgotten Losers / Lauda's Crown? / The Dutch Master / The Last National? text features by Daley Thompson.

16 Dan Dare Return of the Mekon, part two, w: John Wagner & Pat Mills; a: Gerry Embleton.

18 Sgt. Streetwise UNTITLED [The Thames Gang], part two, w: Gerry Finley-Day; photographs by Dave Watts.

21 The Tower King UNTITLED [Lord Spencer's Arrival], part two, w: Alan Hebden; a: Jose Ortiz.

24 Free with Battle in-house advertisement for Battle and Strike Force sticker album; a: UNKNOWN (uncredited).

25 Eagle Interview Bob Champion (three fifths of page) interview by UNKNOWN (uncredited); photograph by UNKNOWN (uncredited). / Kids are Tough! Michael Goes on Parade (two fifths of page) text feature about Michael Webb by UNKNOWN (uncredited); photograph (uncredited).

26 The Money Page: Glamorous Teacher Miss Palmer, Magna Carta School, Staines; photograph (uncredited). / Big Mouth Belt Up, Jim! / School Uniform readers' mail. / Superdad! Nick and Matt Oakley photograph (uncredited). / Brothers & Sisters Get it Taped! / Super Sis readers' mail.

27 Thunderbolt and Smokey! UNTITLED [West Against North], part two, w: Tom Tully; photographs by John Powell.

31 Read Mike Read UNTITLED [The big mistake that I've always made with any sport I've participated in...] (half page) text feature by Mike Read; photographs (uncredited); illustration (uncredited). / Shopwatch It's Looking Good for Spring [Wrangler; Palitoy Pocketeers games] shopping feature (uncredited). / Next Week

 9 Personality Plus Clare Grogan pin-up and mini-bio (uncredited). / 10 'Happy Birthday' LP's Up for Grabs! competition.

Eagle says a special thank you to the following for their help this issue... The Magna Carta School, Staines. Epic Records.

There's still an educational element to Eagle's remit, with surprising success. One such fact is that penguins can catch colds, as the Antarctic is so cold it is germ free, thus penguins have no immunity to the sniffles. Non-fiction highlight of the issue, and I can't get the image of penguins sneezing out of my head - smiling each time I imagine them wiping their beaks on their wings, grumbling away. This is the Eagle of old shining through the new paint job. Barely visible, but still there.

At the offices of the Cranberry Argus, reporter Howard Harvey - the only witness to Doomlord's arrival on Earth - tried to convince his editor that his story was true.

If you are even minimally aware of series such as The Invaders you will know that attempting to convince superiors, or authorities, of alien activity is likely to end in failure. Worse, it might be seen as an eccentricity which points to instability, losing the character their safety nets of regular income and credibility. It is never a good sign when a character jumps straight to his "They're coming... They're coming..." act, rather than patiently investigating and collecting evidence.

Alan Grant is a great writer, but here panders to a degree of clichéd writing which doesn't feel real. In only two installments of the story, Harvey has lost all credibility as a reporter. Tailing the police officer, Harvey loses him at a train station, though sees a vaguely-familiar man get on the train - a closer look reveals that he is wearing the same distinctive alien ring. Arriving at King's Cross Station, he finally remembers the man's name, Sir Matthew Hodges, Cranbridge's member of Parliament.

While the photographic standards are, admittedly, better than average, there is still no discernible advantage to presenting Doomlord in such a manner. Artistic quibbles aside, it is to the strip's credit that the casual murder of bystanders isn't shied away from - with one such unfortunate shown to be disintegrated when the alien's disguise begins to falter.

The Adventures of Fred is a precursor to Mr. Bean, or Matt Lucas' Pompidou, perhaps. Utilising signs to tell its story, with the Inspector Clouseau-like character oblivious to their warnings, the single-page introduction is, however, merely adequate. Comedy is difficult, and when there is the added complication of creating scripts achievable through photography, it makes necessary exaggeration almost impossible. It is impossible to capture crazy antics in photo strips with the same anarchy present in drawn strips.

"Welcome. I see you have returned to sample another weird and bizarre tale from my museum of extraordinary exhibits.

The story behind this charm bracelet is unusual. A romance, perhaps? Alas, no, let me tell you about the person who used to wear this... Harvey Pell, the man who had no heart!

Rivalries in London's gangland sees numerous unlikely and odd "accidents" claim the lives of various people. Edward Rogan, a food connoisseur is poisoned at his own dinner table, the Gray brothers - driving enthusiasts - were involved in a fatal smash when their brakes failed, and Charley "Birdy" Burdett, fell from an office block while birdwatching. Accidents they are not, for they are the work of an assassin whose modus operandi has earned him the moniker "Heartless" Harvey Pell.

Pell's next hit is Tony Lombardo, a man who spends his free time on the shooting range. Deciding on an appropriate method with which to dispose of Lombardo, Pell breaks into the man's office and sets up a pistol to fire the next time someone speaks into the 'phone. Having seemingly set up the perfect murder, he is interrupted by an opportunistic thief who sees the office door open. Tied to the chair, in line with the pistol, Pell is forced to wait on Lombardo returning to his office to release him, hoping that nobody uses the 'phone...

A taut story, with a clever set-up, handled in a clunky manner through the photo strip format. The character of Pell would be revisited in Accident Man, proving that no good idea goes to waste, though here the conceit is badly squandered. With Lombardo's pistol so prominent in the photographs, it is likely he would move it back to its proper location before going anywhere near his 'phone.

The Unexplained!, a text feature which covers supernatural dogs, is suitably placed at the end of The Collector, though is far from an in-depth account of such beasts. Such a small feature was never going to be satisfying, or include the best (i.e. downright creepiest) stories, yet the complete absence of credible (and documented) reports make this a brief note that, yes, such things might exist. Maybe. Possibly. If you squint hard, and don't try to rationalise away such things. More gravity would have helped, but the main problem is with the length.

As the nature of the articles are not usually of interest, I normally give Daley's Diary a brief glance, note the contents, then move on. But this issue's contents has an intriguing comment regarding the fate of the Grand National.

I shall be very sorry, like all lovers of sport, if this year's Grand National is the last to be run. It's become part of the British way of life.

While various attempts, over the years, to have the race brought to an end due to animal welfare concerns, there has never really been a sense that such concerns might actually come to anything. What was different in the early eighties? I kinda want to know how close the race came to ending, but I'm not interested - or invested - enough to go looking. Context in the reporting of current events is appreciated, especially when texts are analysed at such a remove. Approaching the commentary now, without immediate access to material of the period covering the event in detail, makes for a frustrating and tantalising read.

The year was 2210, one mile above the Earth, in the parliament of the Terran Federation, delegates sit in emergency session. . . .

Dan Dare begins strong, with an armada of eight thousand ships approaching Earth. The president reveals that he is a robot, exploding with enough force to destroy the satellite upon which the parliament are aboard. Luna Base, HQ of the Terran Defence Fleet, launch a force to repel the invasion, though possibly not in time.

The Kármán line, sixty-two miles above Earth, is generally accepted as the point at which Earth's atmosphere gives way to outer space, which itself is far higher than the flying ship is portrayed as being. It is a curious statement to make - one hundred miles places the parliament in space, though far, far too low to be in a stable orbit. Comic-book science, however, cocks a snook at such details.

At only two pages it is difficult to imagine how this is going to play out without an increase in space for the strip, though the art more than makes up for such brevity. While robots masquerading as humans is an overplayed device, the final panel is a surprising reversal of conventional depictions of the security of Earth space.

An extremely stiffly posed shot in the first panel of Sgt. Streetwise is enough to turn me off reading the strip immediately, and I honestly don't care what happens. Already, two issues in, the photo strips have outstayed their welcome.

Lord Spencer's men arrive via train, and is told he will be ruler of the Tower of London within the hour. Mick Tempest, the Tower King, has other ideas, and charges into the battle, though must retreat due to overwhelming forces. At Tower Bridge a small group of Tempest's men prepare to hold off the invaders until the bridge can be raised.

Beautiful, engaging, and utterly compelling, The Tower King continues to impress.

The Money Page, for which read "readers' mail" (with additional quirks), poses two problems, the first of which is the more troublesome - Glamorous Teacher, which praises attractive teachers, and showers gifts upon them, is annoying. Summing up a person's career with a statement of how good they look? Not cool. It would have been more appropriate to reward teachers who provided real, solid life-changing classes. The kind of teachers who are remembered long after their pupils have left school. They may not be the most photogenic, but their value to society is incalculable.

The second issue with the letters page is the poor formatting, wasting much of the page. When readers have spent time writing to a publication their comments should be presented in a respectful manner, and with enough variation in content that the page isn't fragmented snippets. As a new title the number of suitable letters might have been low, though this is where thoughtful, and erudite, responses come into play. By padding the page with an ugly border, then boxing off each section, there's so little presented that the title might as well have not bothered including it.

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Eagle [Vol.21]

#03